b'STAY SAFE AND SAVE FACE family. Peers may have much larger influence on how teens think In our Adolescent Medicine practice, we often advise teenagersand how they act. Having more than one group of friends helps to blame their parents in order to save face when confronted withteens navigate away from friend groups that are behaving in risky choices they know are risky and unsafe.Examples might be, Myways. If our teen children only have one friend group, they may mom will ground me if she finds out or Ill never get to go tobe very isolated when they dont go along with their friends risky another party if my dad finds out. We counsel our teen patientschoices. I often ask my teen patients if their friends help them to have a code word with their parents to help get them out ofmake healthy choices. And if their parents like their friends. Both risky situations. For example, if a teen gets to a party and seesare good measures for teens to think about how their friends help that others are smoking marijuana, she might send mom a textthem stay true to their character and stay safe. stating, I forgot to feed the dog. Mom knows that this is theirEvery parents wish is for their teenage children to know what code word and that she needs help to remove herself from a badis right for them, to act in a way that reflects their character, to situation. Mom might even reply, Get home right now. I told youhave friends who help them stay safe and healthy and to feel that you had to do that before leaving. Mom might even say, Imempowered to say no when necessary. Open communication, on my way to pick you up. This helps teens stay safe and save face.role playing, and being available to help our teens get out of risky For this strategy to work, parents must recognize the strength andsituations all help them feel ready to manage peer pressures.character it took for their teen to reach out to parents and stay safe. This is a time for parents to say thank you for reaching out, and not a time for parents to punish or ridicule teens for being in a potentially dangerous predicament.Editors Note: Shanna Garza, MD works at Girls to Women and Young FIND HEALTHY AND SAFE FRIENDS Mens Health and Wellness. For an appointment, call 972.733.6565 or visit In adolescence, teenagers grow to identify more with peers thanthe practice website at www.gtw-health.com.GoodLifeFamilyMag.comJANUARY | FEBRUARY 2020 63'