46 GoodLifeFamilyMag.com JULY | AUGUST 2019 Grit, positivity, faith, past experiences, and our overall mental health help determine how we cope with life adjustments. Having tools for coping with change and big feelings allows children to be more successful during transitional periods. Emotional intelligence is taught through observation and practice; therefore, it is important to provide kids with the space to develop these skills. Regarding change, children develop emotional intelligence by having the opportunity to discuss expectations and possibilities of a life transition. They need time to adapt to the concept of change before they can accept it. Children with a negative and fearful perspective tend to struggle a lot more with change than children who are more laid back, positive, and easy going. Knowing your kids becomes an essential part of the equation because you must allow more time for the child with a negative perspective to adapt to change. RED FLAGS Warning signs with young children can be vastly different and, therefore, difficult to notice. Young children often do not have the words to express their needs and wants and often struggle to tell adults what is going on in their minds. It is our job as parents to help our children develop the necessary language for emotional health. If a child doesn’t have a way to verbally express what is going on, it will come out in different ways. Usually, children will have some sort of physical response since their motor skills are more developed than their verbal skills. Children will withdraw, bed wet, act out in school, become violent with self or others, etc. TIPS • Provide children with the space to decompress and emote the best way they know how. Children will use play and art to express their feelings or to simply decompress. Giving your child this time and space to emote is important because once they decompress, they are more apt to talk about their feelings. • Allow your children the space and time to be able to adapt and accept the process of change. • Talk to your children and give them the opportunity to voice their fears, worries, and concerns. Listen to them, don’t just brush them off, and give them the ability to feel safe and secure with the adjustment. • Stay positive, be honest with them, and help them to see that change is normal, not scary. ADVICE FOR Elementary Students IT IS OUR JOB AS PARENTS TO HELP OUR CHILDREN DEVELOP THE NECESSARY LANGUAGE FOR EMOTIONAL HEALTH.