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38 GoodLifeFamilyMag.com JULY AUGUST 2015 goodGUIDE DO YOU TROLL TEXTS AND STALK SOCIAL MEDIA This is a controversial issue that pits protection against snoop- ing. There are those like Plano Sergeant Courtney Pero who think that when it comes to kids and their safety privacy should be a minor consideration. Pero advises parents to monitor teens electronics use and keep electronics out of the bedroom. Par- ents should be privy to all access codes and passwords. Kivett agrees and reserves the right to look at her teens phones and to know their current passwords or they will lose their device privileges. She explains her approach is not to be a helicopter mom but to be one who provides copious amounts of information about dangers and limitations. As part of warn- ing her teen of the pitfalls of social media Kivett told him that nothing is ever truly deleted and that texts emails or social me- dia posts could be shared or end up in the wrong hands. Worse yet it could hurt someone. Kivett told her son to use this rule of thumb If you dont want Grandma to see it dont post it. Principal William McLaughlin of Shepton High School in Pla- no warns of the dangers of social media and refers to a quote by Devin Padavil first vice president of the Texas Association of Secondary School Principals as reported in the Dallas Morning News. McLaughlin says Padavil called social media the larg- est unsupervised playground in the world dallasnews.com newsmetro20150426-bullying-proves-a-vexing-problem-for- schools.ececommentsDiv. McLaughlin agrees with Padavil. With social media youre giving your kids keys to the world and the world keys to their life. As he does in his own home McLaughlin suggests parents require accountability with the right to check social media and texts at any time. The bottom line he says is that the phone is owned and the bills are paid by the parents. He recommends teaching digital citizenship to kids so they can create a positive digital profile for colleges and employers. Use this as a teachable moment. Theres a happy me- dium between stalking your kid and giving your kid unfettered access to social media. There are some parents who fight fire with fire by using tech- nology to monitor technology. Device monitoring APPs such as Qustodio alert parents to inappropriate posts and filters adult content. Anderson has checked his kids texts before but doesnt do so now and hopes that openness and honesty prevail. There are so many different text programs its impossible to check them if a child wants them hidden. Anderson is friends with his children on Facebook and he talks with them openly about social media and its dangers. At the other end of the spectrum Dallas anesthesiologist Dr. Katie Blakeley checks texts and emails only occasionally because she doesnt want to erode trust. She admires her brothers open policy about reading ALL texts and emails of his teens. It just seems a lot more honest and up front Blakeley says. Theres a happy medium between stalking your kid and giving your kid unfettered access to social media. - William McLaughlin Principal Shepton High School