GoodLifeFamilyMag.com MARCH | APRIL 2018 25 Learn how to raise tweens and teens who • are confident, fearless and courageous! • make inspired, positive choices! • are at peace with themselves, others and life! • reach for dreams of greatness! SATURDAY, MARCH 24TH CALL TODAY TO REGISTER $57 – includes refreshments, lunch, and workbook. Space is limited. 214.682.8980 www.drsandygluckman.com A One-Day Parenting Course presented by Dr. Sandy Gluckman RAISING KIDSTO LIVE EXTRAORDINARY LIVES our kids have without finding and fixing the underlying root cause. Modern medicine teaches that when we fix the root cause, the symptoms go away. How do you know when you are pushing too hard and unintentionally causing your kids to feel “not good enough?” IF YOUR KIDS ARE FEELING “NOT GOOD ENOUGH,” THEY MAY: • Say things to put themselves down. They may even use the words, “I am not good enough.” • Have very high expectations of themselves. • Judge themselves harshly and may be very hard on themselves. • Be afraid to try new things for fear of failing. • Become perfectionistic as a way of making sure that they are good enough. •Developstress-relatedphysicalsymptomssuchasheadaches,gut problems, eczema and asthma among many other possibilities. 4 STEPS OF ACTION THAT WILL BUILD YOUR CHILD’S “I AM ENOUGH” BELIEF 1If your kids have several of these signs, please take it as a message that you are likely pushing them too hard. Be careful not to think that these are just the usual teen symptoms. Not all teens have low self-esteem, nor are they all super-critical of themselves or perfectionistic. 2Begin by making sure not to blame yourself as a parent. Feeling guilt will only give you stress, and stressed parents create stressed children. So let yourself know that you have always parented the best you knew how, and commit to making some changes to your parenting style. 3Ask yourself, “Am I perhaps pushing too hard because I want my child to perform in ways that will make me feel good?” 4Start having Healing Conversations using the 5-1 rule. This means that on any given day your child hears five positive messages from you to one negative one. Watch for the wonderful characteristics your kids display and let them know that these are what make them special. The reason for the 5-1 rule is that when there are five positives to one negative the child’s brain begins to encode a new belief…“I am Enough.” Try this for 21 days, and you will be amazed by the transformation in yourself, as well as your children. You will begin to see your kids through less judgmental eyes; you will enjoy the wonder of who they are; your stress will decrease, and your kids will become calmer and Editor’s Note: Dr. Sandy Gluckman is a learning and behavior specialist, working with parents whose tweens and teens have attention, behavior or mood problems to find drug-free solutions. Reach her at 972.758.1246 or sandy@gluckmangroup.com. www.drsandygluckman.com