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24 GoodLifeFamilyMag.com MARCH APRIL 2016 Ego can be a good thingin the right proportions at the right time and balanced with information and logic. But when our egos take control disregarding reason and good judgment this can lead to all kinds of problems for ourselves and for others. When it comes to Moms and Dads many things can ignite their egos but none are as powerful as the subject of college prep. Oh my goodness College prep makes ego go wild. Why does this happenand what can parents can do differently College selection and prep triggers personal societal and emotional issues for parents. This is understandable because vital decisions are being made about their childrens futures. Where will they go What will they study Will they be accepted Will they be happy Will they be safe Will they be successful Parents need to be sure that they are dealing with this exciting and scary time in a balanced and thoughtful way. This is hugely important because ego-based decisions have a high chance of being poor decisions. When it comes to ego I totally understand the pride and joy a parent feels when her child is accepted at a prestigious college. What a great feeling that is I understand why parents would encourage a child to study in a field that would give him status and help him earn well. I understand the fact that many parents hire tutors to ensure that their son or daughter achieves the necessary grades. And being a parent myself I do realize the pull that parents feel to help their kids complete the mounds of paperwork write their college entrance essays and take them to visit Moms and Dads preferred colleges. Of course I understand this all. But there are two critically important questions we need to consider 1Why do parents do this Are they doing this because they believe their child who is already a young adult is not capable of making his own decisions and does not know what he wants for himself Or are parents doing this because they are unconsciously living out their own dreams 2Is it right for the child How do parents know what is best for the child Do they have a sound knowledge and understanding of their childs strengths and lesser strengths Do they understand the way their childs brain naturally likes to think Do they know whats in their childs heart By Dr. Sandy Gluckman Contributor CO LLEGE PREP PARENTING Are WE Stressing Our Kids Out goodTO KNOW